In the Gray Area

Nothing is as Cut & Dry as it seems.

My last essay, By the Book, didn’t start out with that title. The original title was, The Gray Area, but the essay took on a life of its own once I got started typing—you know how it goes.

In it I said, “If you’d told me this years ago, I’d have never believed it. The thing is, I’ve never been a ‘by the book’ kind of guy. I live my life in the gray area.”

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What do I mean by, “I live my life in the gray area?”

I mean that, I rarely conform. I strive to see everything as what it could be, not what it is✨ because I don’t think anything is as black and white as it seems.

It’s liberating in The Gray Area! You wouldn’t believe all the things I’ve gotten away with—like Scott Stillman said in a Note recently, “One day you’ll realize that no one was really watching, and you could have done whatever you wanted.”

For example: I’ve been in a PGA Players Only dining room—it was surreal. You wouldn't believe the opulence! A buddy of mine was qualifying for the pro golf tour, and I just walked in with him and his caddy, simple as that—act like you belong and you’ll rarely be questioned.

I’ve snuck into provincial hot springs, while they were closed to non-residents due to covid. I think I sounded more like a leprechaun than I did a Canadian—but it worked, aye. 😉

Does that mean that I sometimes skirt the law? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe I’m not sure if the law is always in the Peoples’ best interest—when did Protect & Serve become Harass & Extort?

And in here lies The Gray Area—not all law enforcement is of that mindset, I know there are many Peace Officers out there that have the People’s best interest at heart.

See what I mean? Nothing is Cut & Dry.

• Take Race and Ethnicity—it’s ridiculous that we attempt to label each other in this fashion. Do you have any idea how many generations are in each of our pasts? I don’t—but I do know that when my ancestors immigrated into this country more than a dozen generations ago, our surname was Pollock, not Polk. I’m of Scottish-German descent. But so what? It means nothing. That was so many generations ago that the name isn’t even the same! Heck, Ancestry.com said Pops has Congolese in his DNA, and if you’re talking Race, he is White-White.

• How about Right and Wrong—aren’t those two literally opposites? And yet at times, they can be indistinguishable from one another…

…it’s The Gray Area—I’m trying to tell ya!📣

It also means that I don’t have all the answers—on the contrary, I’m not sure if I have any of the answers.

Take the Note Stuart K Kimball posted recently—it says, “Your limiting beliefs can be the seeds from which your abundant mindset will blossom.”

Now I read that note several times, and I’m not exactly sure what Stuart meant by it. But it really struck a cord with me—synchronicity was definitely at play. I have been practicing using the phrase, “I think,” lately instead of, “I believe.” Because frankly, belief is too much of a commitment—when if I’m being honest, I have absolutely no idea.

But saying, “I think,” instead of, “I believe,” doesn’t make me any less spiritual—on the contrary, my spirituality has blossomed since I’ve realized how little I know.

“I know, that I know nothing.” -Socrates

Socrates believed that acknowledging one's ignorance was the first step towards genuine learning and wisdom. 🤔He might just be on to something there...

I think that all too often we believe that we have to take sides on everything. We believe that we must have an opinion on everything. And then we believe that we’re married to that stance.

In Alternate POV, I mentioned, “That one of the things I like about Substack, is that most everyone is willing to look at things from other’s POV.”

Maybe part of the reason is that Substack itself is kind of a Gray Area? I’ve been on here for over six months, and I’m still not exactly sure of what it is—or how it works🙃and I think I might love it all the more just for that reason!

When I say, “I live my life in the gray area,” what I’m really saying is that I’m open and willing to look beyond the book's cover—as a matter of fact, I’ll probably reserve judgment for as long as possible.

I’m saying that when I look at you, I see you, not a color or ethnicity. I want to know who your authentic self is.

I’m saying that when you’re talking, I’m listening to understand, not to respond.

When I say, “I live my life in the gray area,” I’m saying that the status quo doesn’t apply to me.

NEWS FLASH- The status quo is for suckers! We can do so much better than that.

So take a walk on the wild side! Come on over to The Gray Area with me—there’s a great view, simply because you don’t have to pretend that it’s always clear.

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